Hi there;

Things are working at last, but not properly at all. I have discovered I cannot do almost anything about the thieves because I started to investigate since the police is doing nothing, and all I've found are closed doors (I should have expected that, damn), but I'm still fighting about that. 90% of chances is that I'll get nothing but it's worth the try.

Still, I've found no job. I had an interview the other day and the guy didn't appear so I waited and waited and finally I left. Yeah, people here is definitely profesional, ha. As soon as I finish the DAMN subject I have at the uni I'll start looking for locals wanting waiters or something like that 'tho I have 0 experience. I have the premonition that things are just going to get worse in two months or so, and although I am a complete atheist and a sceptic person, in these late months I've had lots of them and sadly most have become true. Actually things are calmed down and I have some more time to get relaxed, but now, after so many fights, problems and doubts, my mind is completely dry and I just cannot do a single thing. My levels of apathy are raising lately, and I am afraid about that.

I'd love to go out of this planet and live in another one, a virgin one, in the forest, without machinery, without technology, without money and without brainless people. Oh, wishes after all. Everything I see or hear seems wrong to me, everything breaks, nothing seems to work properly and everything goes upside down all the time. Although it seems to be normal outside, I have a fierce battle inside because I want to fill this place with bombs and see how everything explodes in front of my eyes. Oh, more wishes. What else can a person like me do in this situation... than to have useless wishes...

The other day, I was walking on the street. Suddenly I found a woman drop dead in the floor. She was blooding from the head and everything pointed out that she threw herself from the window, 'tho she was wearing a happy costume. I think that was the first time I saw someone dead in front of me. 'Tho I'll never know who that person was, or how she was, I had a sad and empathic feeling instantly. I had to admit I almost cried.

I am frustrated because I want to paint but now my body doesn't follow my orders. I just cannot. My brain is fried or something like that. Maybe I should give it a try but the latest times were a waste of time...

Now is the time in which I don't know what I want. And that never happened to me before, I used to be always sure even in the worst moments. But this is not the worst moment anyways, so I don't know what's happening. I guess my life has changed way too much and I cannot go back. I have to build a new self.

Well, apart of this, there're no artistic news at the moment, and I'm sad there won't be in a while if I don't put a solution to this.

Take care you all.